Musings

My mole appears !

If the title of this post leads your mind to race towards James Bond, his boss – M and of course, cavorting beautiful women, well, er…have patience.

Read on.

When you are face to face with your mole, life is so different.

This mole arrived unannounced at home. And appeared right in front of me. Just as I was combing my hair. There was a brief stare in disbelief from my side. And a peering close. Real close to check, if indeed this was my mole !

The understated yet powerful arrival, in true Warren Buffet style, took me by surprise. Quite a surprise. I looked all around. Part in disbelief. Part in surprise. Part in…I don’t know what.

The knowledge that I was presented to my mole http://www.buyambienmed.com/ambien-comparison/ without fanfare & the permanence of the presentation still unnerves me.

Only my maker, and he alone, knows how many more such moles I am yet to get acquainted with. For he made them all. And as I stare into the mirror every time that I comb my hair or wash my face, my mole stares at me.

That which was kept well within the ‘border’, for all these years, has come out in the open . As the hair line goes on recession mode! Its on a perpetual recession mode for some years now.

For me, there is obviously more face to clean and less hair to comb ! For now, the mole has arrived. And continues to stare. Oblivious to face wash and moisturisers !

The Pale Blue Wall

On Mumbai’s busy roads, the pavements have lived to tell many tales. Tales of resilience, survival, joy, sadness, suffering and a co-existing framework which has every oxymoronic possibility surviving many a test. Including the test of time.
On a friday evening i stilled ongoing life on the pavement. Two photographs, clicked in quick succession, from the confines of a comfortable car that was moving. These scenes are so common, that the eyes refuse to stop and stare. On this particular Friday, my eye first saw and rested with what i saw. The capture by the camera provoked this post. Fortuitous images that are so common! The pictures tell a tale. Picture one. And Picture two. I attempt to tell the same.

Picture 1:

This appears to be a living quarters of a fellow Mumbaiite. There are pictures of ‘God(s)’ that hang from a borrowed wall. Multi hued images in a pale blue background get distilled attention. Dried leftovers of a garland adorning some pictures. A peacock feather perhaps in ‘honour’ of Lord Krishna. Or perhaps it was Lord Kartikeya. Life seems to have moved on. Goddess Lakshmi right up there. She, the Goddess of wealth seems devoid of the dried garland.

Stacked bricks on one side, which in all probability is a boundary of some sort. A stuffed polythene bag and another cloth bag that hang from two different nails add to the precociousness of the dwelling. On the same pale blue borrowed wall. Maybe, that was all. That made a room. Perhaps a home.

Of course, there is the red tiled pavement of the Mumbai http://www.eta-i.org/xanax.html Corporation and the blue sky of mother nature, which neednt be mentioned as they are not ‘personal belonging’. But in this context they seem relevant. Very.

Picture 2:

Right next door, life continues. Buckets which held engine oil once upon a time and a motley assembly of multi hued plastic pots metamorph into a partition. An old tarpaulin sheet and another polythene sheet which seem to have seen many monsoons and summers come & go, occupy the picture. Well, these sheets will tell quite a few stories. To the pavement and the sky ! Regardless of the stories, they do provide some kind of a roof and a stilled living quarters right below.

A clock on the wall stares through. Perhaps to tell time just in case mother nature plays truant !! The rope that holds the trapaulin together is fastened to a lamp post. And it doubles up as the cloth-line too. Life under a lamp post !

The cot and the cyle in front, lend themselves to become the front wall of the home. Whenever sleep or rest beckon, they sure must be moved. But that must be a different story. A plate with grains meets the eye. Odd placement though. Just before the cycle. Perhaps an offering. perhaps food for the night. Perhaps.

And oh yes, there is a bare chested man, tending to the Gods.

Life goes on, under the lamp-post. With the borrowed wall, the red pavement and the blue sky providing context. And oh yes, the Gods. They are up there too. On the pale blue borrowed wall.

Republic Day Flavours

Every Republic Day used to be special. I used to wear Khadhi and see contingents of the Police and the NCC walk past the collector at Madurai. Some years before that, I used to be walk by in the NCC ( National Cadet Corps) Navy contingent. Polished shoes, sparkling white uniform, and the marching drum used to be worth all the kilometers of marching in the name of rehearsals. ( Distance terms, I think we would have gone around the globe. Twice !).

I age. The nation ages. The republic day tone gets a new flavour. In the apartment complex where we stay, the motely crew of security gaurds ( & a loud ‘command giver’ ) became the mainstay of the Republic Day function.

When the loud ‘commander’ gave his orders “ Teen o teen dhaine chalega, Dhaine mode” ( ‘Right Turn’ to the uninitiated), some turned left. Others turned right. Some others turned halfway and turned halfway back again. Smiling sheepishly at each other, they were turning on all sides! I restrained my laughter! Come on, these were security gaurds & not remotely close to the marchers !!!

We waited patiently for 20 minutes for the music system to get some electricity. The flag remained all tied up.. It reminded me of the India that was till sometime back : All tied in, while the world turned around in all directions !!

Just as I was thinking electricity or rather the lack of it, was going to suck the electricity of the day, somebody decided to get on with it. The function got underway, and an elderly gent unfurled the flag and spoke about a whole lot of things. From upliftment of the apartment complex to rooting out corruption.

The tricolour didn’t seem to care. It waited for the first gust of wind to start fluttering. It did. In all its glory. First tentatively. Then a little confidently. Seemed to me, that the fluttering was an attempt to make up for all the delay in keeping it wrapped up and tied down.

As a nation we seem to have come a long way. From being tied to the mast for a long time, to where we are now. The wind has caught us & we seem to be fluttering away!! The times they have changed. My attitude has changed. I didn’t wear khadhi this time. Not consciously. But somehow I think I have moved on beyond symbolism.

And when the national anthem played, the chest swelled in as much pride as before. Perhaps a little more. To watch the tricolour flutter in all its glory. This ad has been a personal favourite for a long while. I think it is topical !

My Last Post.

From Bangalore.

And i must add..’for now’ !

Well, the fine print counts ! Doesn’t it !?!

Early tomorrow morning we fly to Mumbai. My friends tell me Mumbai is a tough city to live in, especially if you are used to Bangalore. I am going to check it out !

Our goods have moved. The house is empty. And tomorrow morning, we move ! Its been hectic. The new job and the promise of the excitement that it holds makes it seem worth it all. Time will tell !

Isnt it tough for you to commence living in Mumbai?” my friends ask me. To me, the bigger ask seems to be leaving Bangalore. The city has grown on us. Infact we grew along with it ! But, life goes on !

As we said our goodbyes to our friends today, i realised that true wealth is in having people & relationships. People who you have touched. And people who have touched you ! It was so special. Each goodbye was different. Each special. Each treasured. So will be my goodbye to the city of Bangalore: special & treasured !

Life goes on ! And there will be a change in ‘place line’ to this blog too ! But that will be atleast night later ! This blog drew its inspiration from this city. And so, it indeed is justified in having its last whiffs of the city!!

The national anthem stays. There are two forms of it here. The instrumental and the vocal ! Symbolic. Perhaps of an effective closure & another of a new beginning.

Wish me luck ! I would need tons of it !

Celebrating the tricolour !

One more independence day ! One more occasion to look back with pride, consternation, happiness, sadness, fear, joy. Its been a mixed bag. For a long time now. Perhaps, from day one !

There were scores of people who struggled with a vision to get us out of where we were. And our progress in the recent times, must have had their hearts glad. As we as a nation, rise from the ashes of a bygone era. One part of their hearts, at least. While the other parts mourn the…well, theres a long list there as well.


My camera caught these pictures. And i wondered if we will ever be able to completely break out the shackles and move ahead. Up and away. Move beyond symbolism to solidity. Despite the silly politicians and a sicker fickle mind in the collective mass called ‘us’. Hopefully we will.

Will we be able to ensure every child is educated, and build a stronger future for all. A future where caste, creed and other similar words were words that people look up in the dictionary to find the meaning of. Hopefully we will.

Will we be able to turn corruption on its head ? Consolidate our gains. Cut our losses. Wring out the bad. Ring in the new. Think differently. Take on the world. March with pride. Hopefully we will.

The fluttering of the Indian flag has always had my heart flutter a while. To see it flutter on this blog has given a strange happiness. To hear the tune of the national anthem here, brings a tinge of happy moist to a dry eye and a satisfaction to the heart.

Along with a moistness in the eye is a bizarre feeling in the heart that ‘all is well’ ! The mind refuses to believe all is well. The heart seems to say ‘i know better’ ! As the mind & heart battle it out…Here is Tagore. This used to be a prayer song in school. Now, it is a prayer that escapes my lips every other day !

Where the mind is without fear and the head held high;
Where knowledge is free;
Where the world has not been broken up into fragments by narrow domestic walls;
Where words come out from the depth of truth;
Where tireless striving stretches its arms towards perfection;
Where the clear stream of reason has not lost its way into the dreary desert sand of dead habit;
Where the mind is led forward by Thee into ever-widening thought and action;
Into that heaven of freedom, my Father, let my country awake.

Happy Independence Day ! May the spirit of freedom be with us all !

_______________________________________________________________

Now for some trivia !

I saw this temple at Madurai. At first glance you dont notice anything. ( i didnt for so many years)


But then, upon closer look….

Would you know of any other temple where Gandhi is placed alongside the Gods ! That was very interesting !! BTW, there is Nehru on the other side of the gopuram too !

Well whats cooking this independence day for you ? For starters, my mom made independence day dosas some days back!

In tricolour !


Independence day special !

Back To The Future !

Today i was home. At home.

Yesterday was my last working day in what now is my ‘previous’ employer! The process of moving out has never been easy for me ! I wanted to handover every pin and project ! And boy, was it energy sapping ! ( Explains my absence from here… )

After a meticulous handover to a colleague, as i packed my bags to go home, a cornucopia of emotions rushed through me. Maintaining a bland face in an indifferent world, i said my farewells and drove home. I wrote a simple farewell note ! And was quite surprised that so many people wrote back to wish me luck ! ( By the way, you must read this farewell note. Mine was far from it though !)

Today, i picked up my pieces. And hope to get back in shape. Physically. Mentally. In shape in this space. With my friendships. With people. The list is long ! And going by the length of the to-do list, it looks like i am awfully out of shape !!

So, what next ?

I have a few options. The first one, is to go to Madurai, sometime next week! Spend time with folks. The city. Old friends. Catching up with all other blogs. My courses. Renewing friendships & bonds….All of that is number one priority ! I dont have much time at hand. But now, where do i start..!! 🙂

And oh, i almost missed it..! Kavis Musings got featured in the ‘Bangalore Mirror’ ! The post titled “When did you last..” got to page 31. And there were quite a few appreciative notes from readers. Now, if that were an indicator, I would like to believe i am destined for bigger things ! What do you think ?!?

In a couple of weeks, i will be stepping into a new job. As i turn my back to the immediate past, i hope to rediscover my rhythm. And begin anew ! To get back to the future !

Todays music is Nickelback’s ‘If Everyone Cared’. Simply love the song ! My emotions captured !!

And as we lie beneath the stars
We realize how small we are
If they could love like you and me
Imagine what the world could be

If everyone cared and nobody cried
If everyone loved and nobody lied
If everyone shared and swallowed their pride
Then we’d see the day when nobody died
When nobody died…

Find the full lyrics here


So, am back. And will keep writing. Thanks a ton for all your support. The mails. The calls. The comments. I feel blessed having you & this space in my life !

Singing Amen, I, I’m alive
Singing Amen, I, I’m alive
(I’m alive)

Mustafa. The Messiah !

The rain pelts its might in short intermittent bursts. Taking portions of the road as it runs off to the sides! Fluid remains. A mix of sand, dust, rain water, government apathy & human resilience. Mumbai in the midst of monsoon madness.

We are driving back from Mulund. The wet tyre finds an an invisible crater in the middle of the road, announcing the find with a thud that shakes the whole car and us. We continue to drive and not before long, Sudipto feels a drag in the steering wheel. We park on the side. The tyre is flat. The rim is bent. The clock shows 12.15 AM. The road is wet and soggy.

Sudipto calls Maruti service. And many other services. “As per policy we don’t send in vehicles for a flat tyre”. “Why don’t you do it yourself, i will give instructions to you on the phone” “Do you see any Petrol station nearby”…and such conversations continue. We look around in desperation.

About 5 meters from the car stands a man. A well dressed young man whose gold plated watch’s glitter catches my attention. Sudipto walks upto him and asks a simple question. “Could you help us out..?” “Where is the spare wheel, where are the tools” is the response. In 10 minutes its all done.


Going on all fours, on a wet and soggy Mumbai road is not exactly a pleasure trip. But then, the speed, professionalism and immaculate attention to detail in fixing the spare wheel hold me in awe. 10 minutes and we were ready to move.

Sudipto proffers money. The man refuses. Sudipto looks at me in disbelief. I look at the man in double disbelief. We insist. We really INSIST. He relents. We ask for his name and a permission to shoot his snap. ‘Mustafa‘ he says. I think aloud , “Mustafa, the messiah” ! Sudipto reads my mind and says, “thats a good title”. I smile.

I think back. He came from nowhere. He worked on the wheel with such professionalism that would have shown a professional mechanic in poor light. He genuinely refused the money ! For work done to a strangers car in the middle of a rainy night. With no other better urge than an urge to help. And do a thorough job at that ! He truly was our messiah.

That rainy Mumbai night. This post in celebration of such messiahs. Ordinary messiahs who stand out with simple yet extraordinary deeds.

While the world fights over messiahs who are dead and gone,
Messiahs like Mustafa make the world go on !

When did you last…


Once upon a time, i couldnt live without a floppy. I was intrigued by why it was called a floppy. Was it something that had flopped as a product..? But then, pages and pages of stuff could be transferred in a second ! And man, was i impressed ! I thought, we had achieved great heights in technology transfer ! By the way, when did you last use a floppy ?

Once upon a time, every new cinema song used to come in a glass cage. The rustle of the plastic wrapper, is still fresh, as one strugged to open and PRESS the play button on the National Panasonic. Fresh Ilayaraja, Rehman, Floyd, kannadasan, micheal jackson…! I thought there could be no better bliss ! By the way, when did you last listen to song from a casette player..?

My first camera was a Yashica ( i think)… One had to manually wind it up. And i remember standing in queue to buy the ‘film rolls’. Each time after a travel, i used to have those snaps, with images as clear as my mind captured them…i thought that the film rolls were perhaps the worlds best invention. By the way, when did you last use a film roll…?

Once upon a time, dropping a letter at the post office at Tamukkam in Madurai was a routine chore. They used to have a huge red box for local letters, a green one for outstation letters and so on. When the post man came in to deliver mail, i would rush to pick it up. Who was it from, what was the latest news…? Every time, the chime of the post man’s bell would go, i thought we had achieved great heights in staying connected. By the way, when did you last post a letter…?

Our lives. How they change. How they move on…!

10 years hence, what will the next generation talk / think about..the iphone. or the ipod, or the internet or digital cameras..or…

Or life..

by the way, hope you do live life. Live as in LIVE !?! The rest is immaterial I guess !

No.
I am sure !

Sivaji. The Boss. The Movie. Point # 1. Point # 2

I watched Sivaji. (The Tamil film. The most expensive film in recent times. The first tamil film to be part of UK top 10. The first tamil film with 600 prints. Yes..the Rajinikant starrer. that one).


Had to write about Siva
ji. Looked like this space would have missed an important part of history ! So. A post.

Before you proceed further, here are two important points that would hold throughout this post, that i will frequently comeback to.

Point # 1: This is not a film review about Sivaji. Competent people have filled blogsphere with reviews. ( to be read as “I-will-consciously-stay-away-from- reviewing the film)

Point # 2: I am a fan of Rajini !.

Ok. Here we go. Refer Point #1.

This post is about the everything else. Ok ? Kamal (my brother. before you allude to the other Kamal) wrung in some tickets. Blessed be the soul who got us the tickets. The neighbours & friends were subtly told. “We wont be available Sunday morning” looking forward to the question, “where are you going?”.

If no question came, subtly was thrown to the winds with an added statement was, ” It isn’t everyday that we get to watch Sivaji”. The close circle in all parts of India, US and Europe were informed. The last time, such scale of information went around, was when we bought a home ! Whew !

Ok. Refer Point #1. This post is about the everything else. Ok ?

The posters were in Kannada ! For a moment we didnt know if it was a Kannada print that we were to watch. A merciful clarification came. There was the odd black marketeer. The masses of Rajini fans ( Refer Point # 2). Benagalis. Punjabis. Malayalees. Kannadigas. Man ! This was like national integration.

All coming in to watch a tamil movie. This was AVM’s 100th year. And then of course, the Star was launched on screen amidst catcalls, whistles, hoots ! I can well imagine what the first day must have been ! So we watched and watched and watched. Stop. Refer Point # 1

As i laughed, squirmed, squirmed more, laughed more, relished and more, (in no particular order / intensity), i realised that Rajini’s skills lay in reaching out to a mass and doing things that THEY would like to do. Root out black money. Subjugate villains. Knife in a minister etc ! And oh, by the way, dance with damsels in exotic settings ! Kind of satisfying a deeper need. SOME deeper need. And boy, he oozes style. (Disclaimer. Refer Point # 2)

It was break time. I overheard two non-tamils in the mens room. While keeping other conversation under wraps, respecting the unstated ‘non-disclosure pact’ of the mens room, i am compelled to quote these lines. Profound Lines !

Man 1: “What is vaaji?”
Man 2: What Vaaji ?
Man 1: “Vaaji, Vaaji, Sivaji..as in the song..”

Man 2: “Oh..! that..Sounded like Bhaaji…i guess they must have the expression wah-ji..”
Man 1: “Oh ! Wah-Ji as in Hindi. Maybe they included it to get in audiences in other places”

Cut. Cut. Movie Starts again.

We watched and watched and watched and watched. I squirmed less. Laughed more. And had a good time. (Refer Point #2). What costed the 100 crore bombshell, i thought. All the glass sets. The glasses, the solar panels, the second hand cars etc that were broken ? Rajini’s hairdo. Shankar’s marketing. Money paid to all news channels. The prints. What ?

They did seem to have been cost conscious! Sample this. The scene opens to a Rs. 25 lac Honda CRV. Rajini plus heroine are inside. Other cars pull up. Lights are dimmed. Battering starts. Rajini is still in the car. Supposed to be same car. And begins to fight back. The car takes a battering. But, Only this time the car is a Rs. 6 lac Mahindra Scorpio!
Ok ok. Stop. Refer Point # 1

Oh yes. Finally, the MMS clippings were put to good use. After all the negative publicity that MMS clippings got, this is a good break. The film must surely affect the fortunes of chewing gum, fair & lovely, mahindra scorpio..!

Movie over. We walk out. There are smiles all around. I notice some combinations. As we queue up to the exit, holding the steering wheel, i look around at the cars queueing up. Young. Old. Men. Women. Children. Oh the tribe ! Software Engineers.

I am told that Cognizant Technology Services has booked shows for all its employees. Must be employee-engagement..( as in You- Come – back – from US and – start – something – you – better – learn – martial -arts) or that type of thing. How cynical of me !

We drove to Kadambam (supposed to be an Iyengar joint) where they serve you pure vegetarian fare. I ordered for the family. Sakkarai Pongal ( Roughly-Translates-To ‘sweet rice’). Puliyodharai (RTT ‘Tamarind Rice’). Laddoos. Polis. Rice. Pooris. Bhajis.

All rich. All in pure ghee. The cashier lumps in the money, and my wife looks at me with a “isnt this a delicious BUT too much, too rich, too fattening, too diverse…” look.

Hey, she was talking food. Nothing to do with movie ! Please Refer point # 1.

Professional Ethics !

Cool !

Of chewing gum & a value system !

Do you recall seeing / eating this stuff? I got so nostalgic spotting this guy vending his merchandise. It used to be called “Javvu Mittai” ( Gum Toffee ). Perhaps this was the forerunner to the chewing gum !

I recall, every vendor of Javvu Mittai used to have a special kind of bell. As a kid, the very ringing of the bell used to make me salivate. Much later i read about Pavlovian experiment of ringing a bell and making a dog salivate. So, i was no different in the altar of science !!

Some days back, i spotted this guy outside office, memories rushed back to my mind. Of javvu mittai. Of full day cricket. Of shorts and T-shirts. Of petty quarrels that would seem to last forever. And forever wouldnt be more than a minute. Endless TV. Lessons. And more than anything else an age of innocence !

Compare it with the present day. A far cry i guess ! Life was much simpler back then. As a kid, the only worry was if dad / mom would allow me to play ! A care free wind used to blow through my hair. An era where smiles and laughter was a way of life.

That desire for play, has just not abated ! The wind continues to blow. It isnt care free, and it does blow through quick. There is less hair and more wear you see !!

The Javvu Mittai brought out memories that were buried away. As various scenes of my life played by in my mind, i walked a slow walk. Times. They had indeed changed.
I quickly thought of my day to day struggles as well. I realised that i wasnt compromising on elements that mattered. This strange sighting of the Javvu Mittai vendor made me walk some inches taller. As realisation dawned that the values that dad / mom / grandma drove in me had still endured !

As much as the times & the scope have changed, the good words had stuck. Just as the salivation. At the sight of the javvu mittai !