Many moons ago, as a teenager, I had a bad fall while riding my bicycle. A sharp stone hit my head. I started bleeding and eventually passed out on the road. There were no phones. No emergency helpline. Just the road, my bleeding head, and the sky above.
But help came.
A few passing strangers stopped. They sprinkled water on me. Teased out my name and address from my semi-conscious brain. Got me to a hospital. Found my parents. And then—they disappeared. No names exchanged. No credit taken. Just people who saw a teenager in trouble and stepped in—because they could.
I still have a scar on my head from that day. But I also have a memory. A quiet one that reminds me I survived not only because I was lucky—but because someone chose to be kind.
Whose Quid? What Quo?
We’ve quid pro quo our default setting. Latin for “this for that”—but really, “don’t do anything unless you get something in return.” It sounds neat. Fair, even. Until you ask: Whose quid? What quo? And what happens when kindness comes without a price tag?
Actor Nawazuddin Siddiqui once walked the streets of Mumbai broke, hungry, and almost invisible. In his words:
“There were days when I had no money for food. But there was always someone—someone I didn’t know—who’d offer chai or a meal.”
No conditions. No contracts. Just chai. Just kindness.
When Life Becomes a Ledger
Today, deal-making is fashionable. Everything is a deal. A pitch. A negotiation. The word transaction has crept into places where it doesn’t belong—like friendships, partnerships, even parenting. If you do X, I’ll do Y. If you help me, I’ll remember you. If you don’t, I’ll remember that too.
But here’s the problem. If life becomes a ledger, what happens to the things we can’t count?
Gratitude. Care. Listening. Sitting quietly with someone. Standing by a friend even when they’ve messed up. These don’t show up on balance sheets. And yet, these are the very things that make us human.
The Kindness That Doesn’t Trend
Everyday kindness is far too ordinary for primetime.
It doesn’t trend. It doesn’t come with background music.
No one’s cutting a reel when you offer your seat to someone or help them pick up a fallen grocery bag.
It’s instinctive. Like scratching your head when thinking or offering tea when someone visits. It’s coded into our DNA, so natural we barely notice it ourselves.
And when it does make the news—“Man helps elderly woman cross street!”—you know the world’s a little upside down. That headline should be the default setting, not the exception.
Kindness doesn’t ask for attention. It just shows up, quietly, like it always has.
Holocaust survivor Eddie Jaku, who later became an Australian citizen and author of The Happiest Man on Earth, put it plainly:
“Kindness is the greatest wealth. It costs nothing, but it means everything.”
The Real Deal
So if you must make a deal, make this one:
Offer kindness without calculating return. Build trust without waiting for leverage. Be generous without expecting applause. Because the real deal isn’t signed.
It’s just done. Silently. With grace. Often without anyone watching. And maybe that’s the point: the real deal isn’t signed.
It becomes part of your signature move—how you show up for others, without fanfare or fine print. Kindness is not weakness. It is strength.
We get by because of others. Even if we sometimes forget to say so.
Not everything is a transaction. Life is the bigger deal—larger than all the deals you can ever make. Because the real deals in life—the ones that change you—are never signed.
They are simply made. By people who show up, sprinkle water on your bruised head, and walk away quietly.
Absolutely superb story and message. We say the old times were good (and there was more kindness) because the ledger-keepers (they are there in every century in plenty) are forgotten and kindness is remembered. Kind people leave their mark on our psyche, they do not expect anything in return. Interestingly being kind does not require formal education, it is not taught in any university, and must not be taught too for that act will create ledger keepers. Poor people, rich people, well educated and unlettered can be kind. It requires big heart.
In good old days, ladies would make a knot on their pallu (of their saree) to remind themselves to do something. I feel God creates a wound on body or heart to remind us to be kind to others. The mark on the forehead has not made you less handsome, in fact, it has made you more charismatic.
Thank you Sir. As always. “Interestingly being kind does not require formal education”. Indeed. Indeed. I often wonder if our education chips away at kindness. We have too many ledgers!
So well Said . Thank you for shunning the light on Kindness She deserves better
Thank you Nirmala. I am sure you meant shining. We have to be deliberate about shining more light on it I realise. Thanks much again.
Kindness and empathy are built from interactions and understanding another perspective. Both are waning. Our UI is being re-built for transactions, not even decision-making, let alone relationships. https://manuscrypts.com/2025/03/23/a-convenient-path-to-extinction/
I trace this back to the left brain dominance and the WEIRD mindset, which is increasingly spreading beyond the West into any metro around the world, and is built on individualism.That in turn, creates an increasing trend towards making things legible and that probably explains the ledger behaviour. https://manuscrypts.com/2024/09/01/entropy-and-history/
Thanks so much Manu. Thoughtful and has gotten me to think more and scribble more. There is a blogpost coming soon.
Beautiful. Thoughtful reflection as always.
I wonder if it is the world or is it the person? Can a person tear themselves apart from the world and do the unexpected: be kind? Be thoughtful as your race to stack up numbers?
When a world expects the intangibles to be built into an organisation, that gets measured. Paradoxically, this very measurement erodes whatever was built. In a world that puts numbers to everything, the tangibles have less meaning- the “likes” matter.
And in such a world, what you write is so pertinent. It makes one pause and reflect on measurable goals and how far they take you.
Thanks much Abhijit. I think every one of us have the options and opportunity to be kind within the constraints that we deal. And impact the systems we belong to. I have met so many people who do that so very well. Indeed be thoughtful as you stack up the numbers!
Yes. Thats the world where we live in. But ‘how much’ and ‘how to’ participate in it is something that can be crafted well. IMHO. It’s not all or nothing.
Thanks much again. Talk soon.
So true… it is mysteriously joyful to be part of unsigned deals sometimes…
Yes indeed. It is joyful. All the time!
Especially, when we take the time to reflect and catch ourselves being kind and otherwise! Thanks much Latha.
Such a warm reminder on a Sunday morning. Quid pro quo has become a de facto norm.
Thanks Aditya. Yes. It may be de facto. But we have choice! And we can live differently.
What an acknowledgment and nod to Kiindness
You’re right—kindness doesn’t need a spotlight to matter. It’s the quiet hum of humanity, the unspoken contract between souls.
When the world feels loud with greed and grand gestures, real connection happens off-camera: a held door, an unasked-for coffee, a “you okay?” when no one else is listening.
Eddie Jaku had it right—kindness IS wealth. Not because it’s rare, but because it’s renewable. Pass it on, and the balance never dips.
So here’s to the small, sacred deals we make without signatures—the ones that say, I see you. You matter. No invoice, no applause. Just the quiet art of being human.
“It’s the quiet hum of humanity”. Thats a super line Gaurav. Thank you so very much. “So here’s to the small, sacred deals we make without signatures—the ones that say, I see you. You matter. No invoice, no applause. Just the quiet art of being human.” – Very powerful. Thanks much.
A few months ago my son met with an accident and if it was not for the timely help and unbelievable kindness of the strangers going past, the story would have been different.
Kindness is such a simple gesture. Just do.
You’ve said to so beautifully and I live it every moment.
Thanks much for sharing. I guess the help while in trouble is a current day feature as well. Your comment reaffirms faith. Grateful.